Mercy Me

When I went to Kenya, it was for such a smattering of different reasons, but I didn't realize that I was going to meet my heart there. For years it had dripped and ached with the desire to help. It'd gotten mad, fighting mad, plenty of times over how hard it is to reconcile ourselves with this world.

When I found my heart in the sky and laughter of that gorgeous country of God's, two things happened that made me positive of God's existence on earth.

1. Encoring my unsolicited solo performance of "Amazing Grace" with an entry in a Kenyan prayer book of "I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For."

2. Meeting Mercy. I don't know how you can not give birth a child and still feel that you own some part of her, but it is possible. I want her to be provided for, appreciated, thriving in a way that even feels different than desiring that for a sibling. I have woken up in the middle of the night with an inkling that she was thinking of me.

For those of you who know me well, you know that Mercy has become part and parcel of that time. She reminds me of my heart, of my humanity, of how very little we have to do to change the world.

Josie recently sent me this picture from her July trip and it appears that she's becoming a confident little leader.

Glory and praise to God. If this is the only prayer he answers for awhile,

keep it up, ok?

small benediction - thursday

Go out of your way to do something for someone. Put a little effort into it.

***
I had a friend I sort of fell out of touch with. Some of it was my pride, some of it healthy distance. I heard about a life change she was going through, and though we hadn't spoken in 6 months or so, I sent something to her. I talked it over with the man, and he encouraged me to send it - even if I never heard back, it would make her day.

This week I got back the nicest, sweetest card in response.

I could have sat on it. I've done it a million times before, but that simple act let her know I cared, and reminded me that all isn't lost.

***

Though I don't think of myself as prideful, it is hard to humble myself and reach out with the frequency I'd like.

Might we go beyond ourselves today and love someone. Might we be the love we so desperately seek.

Be loved. Be blessed.

I used to write that a lot as a closing line in emails, thanks to inspiration from an old college buddy.

I found it beautifully comforting to pass that along to my friends as a benediction. I felt that in our rushrushbusybusy work lives, it might be soothing to take a second and be loved before we jumped back in.

***

A few nights ago I called my voicemail at work to remind myself of a task. In my calm 9 p.m. voice, I told my future self to rest and take a minute to be thankful the next day. I uttered those words, "Be blessed. Be loved." By the following morning, I was already amped up and needed the reminder.

***

I hope that I still do things like this for my friends. If I haven't been lately, you deserve a group apology. I am sorry. It's been a selfish time, learning to be in love and start a new job. I am sometimes neglectful. I hope to work it out.

First step: don't miss chances for small benedictions.

Happy Wednesday all. Be blessed. Be love to someone who needs it today.

A missive before the safari begins

Hi kiddos.

I apologize for the incredible lack of posting as of late, but this summer has been certifiably nuts.

As seems to be the case with me, life changes tend to come in big, sweeping movements. Maybe it's my flair for the dramatic, but when something is around the corner, you can bet it'll be a good story that sets me stumbling upon it.

The latest adventure in my life is a new career path. Starting at the end of this month, I'll be moving from the opera world and will deal with prima donnas of a more primal nature - I'll be the Development Events Coordinator in charge of Jazzoo for the Kansas City Zoo.

1. Jazzoo is this wicked cool event that raises serious money for the zoo each year, so that was a huge reason I took this job.
2. This will give me the development experience I'll need to run a not-for-profit someday. (Which is my new longterm dream.)
3. Lions, cheetahs, koalas and elephants at work everyday?

Ummm...no-brainer.

Still, though I've been thinking about a switch for a bit now, this opportunity moved SOOOOOO quickly. From interview to acceptance = 7 days. Just enough time to make your head spin. But in the thick of all this, I've been reminded of just how often God speaks to me this way. Too much time or room to think, and I'll whittle all the beauty out of something. Things moving too fast keeps me dependent on Him.

I've got about 8 days left at the opera, then I head to Florida with the family for some good, quality R&R before I move into my new digs over at the zoo. Literally. Like, nearby the sea lions and stuff. I can eat lunch with the zebras. (Hope they like hummus.)

Anyway, I'm beyond excited, a little nervous (since this is largely uncharted ground for me), and mostly immensely thankful for God's sweet provision. He's been pouring down surprises all over the place as of late and I'm feeling just a little bit like I'm His favorite. (I know, I know. Every person is His favorite.)

In the meantime, keep me in your prayers, swing by the zoo in August, and keep checking this space. I'm sure there'll be all sorts of interesting fodder to muse about soon enough!

"Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen." Ephesians 3:20-21

And heaven met earth...

last Friday night in Lawrence, where cherubim and seraphim took a break from all their white cloud loafing-about to inhabit the bodies of Neko Case and her opening band, The Jon Rauhouse Quartet.

To try and explain the aural bliss I encountered with my buddy Josh is next to impossible (so take this guy's word for it), but I dare say that this show was the best concert I've ever been to.

Neko has this mesmerizingly powerful voice, with a sort of Patty Griffin-ish vibe. But she's louder. And crazier. And hilarious. Though both songstresses have this delightful shyness to them, you get this feeling that Patty would sip on some cammomile tea and Neko would throw back some Jack.

Oh, and there was banjoin' at this show. Lots of it.

If you haven't taken my advice and gotten hip to Neko, pick some of it up this weekend. She plays well with wine and company or coffee and a car ride...you pick.

Setlist: A Widow's Toast; Things That Scare Me; That Teenage Feeling; The Tigers Have Spoken; Lady Pilot; Maybe Sparrow; Dirty Knife; Tightly; If You Knew; Margaret vs. Pauline; Buckets of Rain; I Wish I Was the Moon; Deep Red Bells; Lion's Jaws; Train From Kansas City; Hold On, Hold On; Star Witness.

Encores: The Tigers Have Spoken; The Needle Has Landed; John Saw That Number; Knock Loud.

My concert highlights: That Teenage Feeling; I Wish I Was the Moon; John Saw That Number

"For a time I rest in the grace of the world, and am free.”

- Wendell Berry

******

Cooking and chopping are holy work.

Standing over the waste bin,
weeding through chaff,
these modern, citified hands
touch the bounty of the earth,
blessing it with water,
storing and gathering for its full and intended use.

It is a very good thing to be a woman.

Ankles stand small and proud,
supporting these ever-expanding hips,
preparing for the fulfillment of
their future blessing.

The light hum
of this feminine heart
beats strong
as delicate hands
chopchopchop
singing a sweetly staccato song
in a tune older than time.

Sun is shinin'...the weather is sweet...

It’s a beautimous day in KC and I'm feeling awesome.

In the vein of posts of old, I thought I’d throw out a few things that make me awfully happy about spring:

Walking barefoot through the grass.
Popping open my sunroof.

Veggie sandwiches.
Listening to the Gipsy Kings.
Making lemonade.

The clean smell of the air.

Going to the farmers' market.
Reading on my miniscule porch.
Sitting outside for lunch.

Iced coffee.

The "idea" that I could run outside...anytime I want.

Fresh fruit.
Resurrecting the age-old debate: Which bar has the best patio?
Wondering if I should put on sunscreen.
Whipping out the self-tanner.
Watching as the pile of unneeded jackets accumulates in my back seat.

What about you, peanut gallery? The best parts of Spring for you…go.

Today's soundtrack: Sunshine - Keane - Hopes and Fears