As we are meant to be

I’m becoming a voyeur again.

Maybe it’s the gorgeous weather (seriously, 60 tomorrow?!?) or the amazing new people I’ve met (I love new perspectives), but I'm seriously staring. A lot. In inopportune places.

I went through a phase like this last year when the weather got nice again and my pen was flowing into my journal with flood-like intensity. At that time I wrote a lot about new ideology that challenged me, habits I was trying to correct or huge things I was trying to do.

This time, it’s tending toward simple revelations about God's presence in all of us.

On Sunday I wrote little 4 and 5 line poems about the people surrounding me. Their attitudes, their leanings, their desires. I made up whole lives and stories for complete strangers. Something about the exercise made me feel closer to them…like I could see their humanity and maybe identify with them in the same way God does. All those words and all the feeling it stirred up got me wondering…

What does God see when He looks at us?

I think he sees a multitude of beautiful and true things: Good intentions. Deeply hidden darkness. Dreams yet unrevealed. Beauty that has existed since the womb. Fissures about to crack. Bits of potential ready to be unleashed.

He sees us as we are.

I thought about this as I watched a woman eating lunch today. She couldn’t find a seat in the food court, so she stood up and ate her Taco Bell ravenously. Her bags slipped off her shoulders. She craned her neck to the side, holding the straps up while her hand remained free to shovel in food. She didn't have the time to set down her bag.

I bet she finished eating in 3 minutes, furiously wrapping up her papers, racing back to her desk to workworkworkwork.

We are not made to exist like that.

God does not see us as vessels of productivity that should eat standing up.

“O, Lord, you searched me
and you know me.
You know when I sit and when I rise;
you perceive my thoughts from afar.”
Psalm 139:1-2

All this watching makes one strangely present to those around us. It enlarges our hearts and makes us recognize our brethren. It leads to wishes and desires for humanity.

May we see others as God does. May we know how God sees us. Pure. Beautiful. Loved. Treasured. Good enough.

Today's Soundtrack: Favorite - Neko Case - Live from Austin